Words

words
so necessary
seeped in pitfalls
emotional and cultural and ethnic and national and...and...and all
buttons when pushed completely change any intended meaning
into something else
a love affair with words can turn
at any given moment into
a battle royale
I am outspoken and often fall
when I mean to run
I have scars to prove it
so is it any wonder that in the city
I've learned to keep a rein on my outspokenness
and release my grip only in the workplace and at home
the workplace because I haven't the energy or patience
to keep still anymore or tiptoe around the usual
pitfalls and at home because my cats
or any two-legged creature who might venture in
will just have to take me as I am
but outside in the city or elsewhere I tend
to be cautious because words can cut deep
and cause damage too easily plus
it could also get me killed which
I have no interest in whatsoever.

Words
so necessary
disappear or hide
and often simply run away and I can see them
making their escape but my speech apparatus can't
seem to catch up to them and pull them into my mouth
but I'm an Indian
not a cowboy and I have MS and
this is one of the reoccuring symptoms and the one
I hate the most and find embarrassing but now
with chemotherapy this symptom has been relinguished as
the plot thickens and the words no longer run but simply
disappear or hide from me in the haze of the side
effects of the drugs administered to chase away the 'bad guys" and
are also indiscriminate when it comes to also killing off the
"good guys" does this sound familiar?
cops and robbers cowboys and Indians
the truth is
it is all one hell of a game that the affected nerve centers play
with the rest of the brain in the name of healing
and there are just no words
to describe it.